This is one of those things that is just weighing heavy on my heart.
Yesterday was my peep's first day back at school and so I ran errands from 8am-3pm. No kidding. One of those stops was to my fave store ever, TJ Maxx. While hustling through the store (I was on a mission) a mom and her 3-4 year old toddler were shopping too.
And he was SCREAMING.
Not like "kinda fussy."
Full blown 110% temper tantrum SCREAMING.
It was SO ANNOYING! In fact, it was giving me a headache!!!!!
So?
There weren't many people in the store but what I can tell you is this. EVERYONE in the store was talking about this mom and her screaming kid.
Cuz my assumption is, the mom was DEFINITELY enjoying it.
Overhead two older ladies after giving each other "the look," (you know the one) "Well, we certainly didn't allow our kids to act that way now did we?"
Then we got into checkout and I was one person removed from the mom and the still screaming child. The child had lost his shoe. It was on the ground and the mom was wrangling with him and trying to check out AND keep her cool. The woman in front of me looked at the shoe, looked up, and rolled her eyes. She was not going to say a word or pick up the shoe. So I left my cart, picked up the shoe, walked it over to the mom and tried to give her my best "Oh honey I have been there" look and a smile.
Because b#$ches, I don't care who you are, how old you are, how much money you have, what your child is or is not diagnosed with, if you're a mom, you've been there. It may not have been at TJMaxx. But it's been somewhere.
And let me say this right here and right now. I watched the mom. She was cool as a cucumber. At least she appeared to be. She was straight up ignoring that child. I wanted to applaud her! She wasn't, begging, cajoling, giving in, negotiating, bribing, nope. She was ignoring it. I wanted to stand on the counter and give her a round of applause.
Because it was just a few short years ago that I was in that very same situation with Luke. And all the therapists told me.... "no matter how much it hurts you, and it WILL hurt you, you've GOT to ignore it." And I did. And it took weeks and weeks of this exercise before Luke gave up. Before he realized, "Damnit sometimes we have to go to the store and I just have to deal with it," but until then, oh did I get the stares. Oh did I get the comments. Oh was I sweating while attempting to look as cool as a cucumber. And oh did I want to run out of the stores crying myself. But as moms, we push through. We must.
I don't know if this child was diagnosed with autism or anything else.
((((Insert sound of screeching tires here))))
That's it.
That's the whole point.
I don't know if this child was diagnosed with autism or anything else.
First of all, as a friendly reminder out there -- many autistic children are nonverbal. The only way they even CAN communicate many times is through screaming and crying. Period. There were times Luke was sick that I WISHED he would scream and cry so I would know something was wrong BEFORE we went into the ER. That's it people. That's all they've got. There. Is. No. Other. Way.
But I'm curious. What does leukemia "look" like? Does it have a "look?" No? So for all we know this little guy was suffering from radiation treatments and in a great deal of pain. Oh. OK.
Wait, what does irritable bowel syndrome look like? Does it have a "look?" No? So for all we know this little guy was dealing with pains in his stomach that felt like he was getting stabbed? Oh. OK.
What does a brain tumor look like? Does it have a shirt that you have to wear? Perhaps a bright red one that says "Be patient with me, I have a brain tumor." No? It doesn't? Oh. OK.
My point is people -- compassion. Try it out. Don't judge a book by it's cover. EVER. Don't judge a child by what he does, or does not look like. EVER. And do NOT... .do NOT EVER throw stones while you're living in a glass house.
And here's news --
We ALL live in a glass house.
And another thing? It's nunya business as we say in the south. That woman's money is just as green as anyone else's. Her child wasn't hurting anyone. He was loud. That's all. He was under control, but he was loud. If he had been a teeeeny tiny newborn baby who was wailing you know what those women would have said? "Oh that poor dear. She can't get her precious baby to quit crying." Nunya business. If you don't like it, come back later, because you know, in public places you aren't safe from crying children and.... people in general. If you don't like it, shop online!
That's it. That's my rant.
Yesterday was my peep's first day back at school and so I ran errands from 8am-3pm. No kidding. One of those stops was to my fave store ever, TJ Maxx. While hustling through the store (I was on a mission) a mom and her 3-4 year old toddler were shopping too.
And he was SCREAMING.
Not like "kinda fussy."
Full blown 110% temper tantrum SCREAMING.
It was SO ANNOYING! In fact, it was giving me a headache!!!!!
So?
There weren't many people in the store but what I can tell you is this. EVERYONE in the store was talking about this mom and her screaming kid.
Cuz my assumption is, the mom was DEFINITELY enjoying it.
Overhead two older ladies after giving each other "the look," (you know the one) "Well, we certainly didn't allow our kids to act that way now did we?"
Then we got into checkout and I was one person removed from the mom and the still screaming child. The child had lost his shoe. It was on the ground and the mom was wrangling with him and trying to check out AND keep her cool. The woman in front of me looked at the shoe, looked up, and rolled her eyes. She was not going to say a word or pick up the shoe. So I left my cart, picked up the shoe, walked it over to the mom and tried to give her my best "Oh honey I have been there" look and a smile.
Because b#$ches, I don't care who you are, how old you are, how much money you have, what your child is or is not diagnosed with, if you're a mom, you've been there. It may not have been at TJMaxx. But it's been somewhere.
And let me say this right here and right now. I watched the mom. She was cool as a cucumber. At least she appeared to be. She was straight up ignoring that child. I wanted to applaud her! She wasn't, begging, cajoling, giving in, negotiating, bribing, nope. She was ignoring it. I wanted to stand on the counter and give her a round of applause.
Because it was just a few short years ago that I was in that very same situation with Luke. And all the therapists told me.... "no matter how much it hurts you, and it WILL hurt you, you've GOT to ignore it." And I did. And it took weeks and weeks of this exercise before Luke gave up. Before he realized, "Damnit sometimes we have to go to the store and I just have to deal with it," but until then, oh did I get the stares. Oh did I get the comments. Oh was I sweating while attempting to look as cool as a cucumber. And oh did I want to run out of the stores crying myself. But as moms, we push through. We must.
I don't know if this child was diagnosed with autism or anything else.
((((Insert sound of screeching tires here))))
That's it.
That's the whole point.
I don't know if this child was diagnosed with autism or anything else.
First of all, as a friendly reminder out there -- many autistic children are nonverbal. The only way they even CAN communicate many times is through screaming and crying. Period. There were times Luke was sick that I WISHED he would scream and cry so I would know something was wrong BEFORE we went into the ER. That's it people. That's all they've got. There. Is. No. Other. Way.
But I'm curious. What does leukemia "look" like? Does it have a "look?" No? So for all we know this little guy was suffering from radiation treatments and in a great deal of pain. Oh. OK.
Wait, what does irritable bowel syndrome look like? Does it have a "look?" No? So for all we know this little guy was dealing with pains in his stomach that felt like he was getting stabbed? Oh. OK.
What does a brain tumor look like? Does it have a shirt that you have to wear? Perhaps a bright red one that says "Be patient with me, I have a brain tumor." No? It doesn't? Oh. OK.
My point is people -- compassion. Try it out. Don't judge a book by it's cover. EVER. Don't judge a child by what he does, or does not look like. EVER. And do NOT... .do NOT EVER throw stones while you're living in a glass house.
And here's news --
We ALL live in a glass house.
And another thing? It's nunya business as we say in the south. That woman's money is just as green as anyone else's. Her child wasn't hurting anyone. He was loud. That's all. He was under control, but he was loud. If he had been a teeeeny tiny newborn baby who was wailing you know what those women would have said? "Oh that poor dear. She can't get her precious baby to quit crying." Nunya business. If you don't like it, come back later, because you know, in public places you aren't safe from crying children and.... people in general. If you don't like it, shop online!
That's it. That's my rant.
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”
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